For (almost) the entirety of my life, I have taken the backseat... I am in most case the follower... In a few times, I lead but those were the times that others push me to do it, not myself volunteering to take the chance to head.
I have always enjoyed the ride and just join in with the flow... I never like to give the directions... But I never took my being a follower negatively... as a matter of fact, it teaches me to challenge... I may be the follower but I surely challenged the order before I do them.
SILAB taught me to lead. On top of that it gave me a chance to know myself... My chance at SILAB made me realize how much I hate to fail or should I say, how afraid I am of failure... Failure was never a favorite, and a next time will never come once there is that chance... you fail one and its over... no more second chance... there is always a mark that you stumble... there are always scars to remind you.
And now, Ops has entirely changed my being. It challenged me to take the wheel. It imposed me to be on my toes and head the pack. It gives me the opportunity to lead. This is harder because this is entirely work, and professionalism is at stake here, plus my promotion and all those things...But now I'm no scaredy cat with leading... because there is no room for that... and I have faith, in God, in my self, and of course the people who are there willing to give me a hand...
...failure or not, I have to lead.